Men and women are different. Thus, their likes and dislikes will also vary from each other. Hardly you will find a man and woman sharing similar things and thoughts. That is why, both are from different poles. What men like is hated by women and vice versa. The tiff between these two genders is never ending. For example, lets check out few things that men hate but women love. Watching soap operas: Men hate to watch those melodramatic soap operas that are filled with fiction. These not so natural stories and funny characters are hated by men but loved by women. Soap and serials are targeted for women and thus they love it. After returning from office, men find their women glued into the television screen. Men hate this girly habit. Reading romantic novels: Women are truly into romance. That is why, reading romantic novels or listening to die hard romantic tracks are their hobbies. Men hate to read romantic novels and find these books boring. This also causes a conflict in couples. Women are emotional so they prefer romantic novels over sci-fi movies or thriller books. Getting up on time: Most of the women love punctuality and are always on time. Men hate alarms, but women do not like to get delayed in their task. Thus, putting an alarm and getting up on time actively is something that women love but men hate. Gossips: This is a debatable point. There are women who feel that even men love to gossip. However, a man would never get into this girly habit of gossiping. Kitty parties, gossiping about not so close women or even friends are a hobby of a woman. Men hate this girly habit but women love it. Women feel that gossiping makes their day! Ladies night out: Men always desire to go out with their women and show off their male friends. But, women prefer hanging out with women. This is a common relationship problem that couples face while dating. Women might be committed but they also wish to spend time with their friends. Sometimes, men wonder why their women go for ladies night out. This also creates a doubt as to the woman is cheating on him. It is one thing that men hate but women love! Self-obsessed: Both men and women are self-obsessed but women tend to show it on the face. Jealousy, greed for appreciation etc shows a narcissist woman. Always complimenting a woman even if she is not looking good is something men hate. Love for kids: Women become mothers and they are attached to kids. From childhood days, you will find a girl getting too excited to hold a newborn baby. Women love kids and most of the men on the other side hate them. Pampering, playing and saying, "Oh he is such a cutie kid" is something men can't do. Men hate these things but women love them. Do you agree?
Sometimes less time can actually be a lot of fun. Find out how... Are hectic schedules ruining your sex life? Deadlines to be met and boss sounding you out every quite so often shouldn't play spoilsport when it concerns your sexual desires. So if you are out of time for a prolonged sexual session, have more fun with a quickie to get the adrenalin flowing again. Follow our users guide to indulge in a quickie. ElevatorRahul and Sonia, colleagues at a call centre swear by the benefits of intimacy in an elevator. Says Rahul, "It's a lot of a fun when you sneak out to the elevator. Making out there acts as a huge stress buster, especially when you are staying up nights continuously. You can always stop the elevator midway, do your thing and be back in seven minutes sharp. But be ready for the looks that your friends give you once you step back in. " Reiterates Sonia, "quickies are a lot of fun if you know what you want and how to go about it." Explains psychologist Amit Verma, "A five minute sex session is a good idea, so long you limit it at that. It is the best solution in a age when lack of proper sex sessions creates a lot of frustration and stress. Yet, I would still advise that when one indulges in such activities, it is best to be mindful of the people around as it might not have a great effect on children if they happen to catch you in the act. Doing it in an elevator is a good idea so long you don't hurt yourself in that rush. " Movie theatreA great place to get dirty down and under. Especially in empty theatres where you have a lot of space and lack of prying eyes. Reveals Jyoti Sharma, a student, "My boyfriend and I often hangout at movie halls. This saves us from getting caught and the intimacy we both crave for is what we can achieve in the last row seats. It's quite a kick when I imagine about all the things me and my lover have done at movie halls. With romantic songs in the background, it's the perfect setting for one to get cosy." According to Verma, movie theatres guarantee uninhibited privacy. But, if you get caught in the act, you might find yourself in a very embarrassing situation. "It's best to just find pleasure in touching each other and not experiment with intimate positions. Also, indulging in the act can be more enjoyable than the actual act itself. So why not explore these areas?" suggests Verma. Back of a club/restaurantBeing out on a hot date sharing your wildest fantasises with your dream boat is exciting, so if both of you are up for a quickie, head to the darkest corner of a nightclub, or even the bathroom, and get your bang on. "To have it on at a restaurant lends a great boost to one's sex life. Often it breaks the monotony and ups the desirability factor. Sometimes, I like to have these sessions with my wife, a quick one while heading back home, behind a club. It makes us feel young and bond with each other, the way we used to as teenagers," confesses Aakash Malhotra. "The dark areas behind a club, the staircase or some such place actually is a mighty turn on for your libido. The thing with couples is they should do what they both would enjoy sexually. If making out at the back of a popular night club or eatery facilitates their idea of bonding, then there is no harm. You might have people giving you curious stares, but being naughty at times helps," points out Verma. StairwellThe staircase in your office building could serve as the ideal place for a 1hot romp with your girlfriend. Rhea Kumar, a manager says getting it on in the staircase is a huge turn on. "This particular colleague of mine is a pro at quickies. A bang on at the staircase preferably on a really high floor can make you go crazy for a few minutes. It can make you feel very adventurous and desirable," she adds. Psychologist Sheetal Mehta however warns of the risks involved in getting dirty on the staircase. One wrong position and you could go tumbling down. "Stairacases are good fun, but do not go overboard with such places because you could end up hurting yourself beyond measure," she explains. CarSo it's not an original idea, but a quickie in a car, at a location where you won't be arrested for public indecency, can be a very memorable experience. Cars are not only spacious, but they remain the most wanted fantasy of most couples. Ravi Tanwar, a sales executive, totally swears by it. "My girlfriend and I do it in the car just before I drop her home sometimes. It is a lot of fun doing at deserted place with no one to disturb you. Also because of the limited space, you are almost bumping into each other and that definitely is a turn on that keeps us wanting to go on for more." Mehta agrees that cars and four wheelers can make you feel very romantic and good about yourself. "Getting intimate within four wheelers can do wonders to couples who go through a crisis or are in need of closeness with each other," she advises. AlleyThe narrow dark alley behind a restaurant or your workplace does sound like something straight out of a romantic thriller. And you can give it a shot as it's a good option for those who are wildly adventurous. "I like my man because he is very unconventional when it comes to physical intimacy. He gets utterly passionate in the most unlikely of places and we often end up feeling up each other in ways beyond our wildest imagination. Actually it brings all your dark fantasies to life," winks choreographer Anjali Menon. Even as Mehta agrees, she points out," Dark places are always best for those who want to be physical and do not have ample space outside. Yet 'is best to use your discretion about such places because you might end up with the wrong kind of people at the wrong time." OfficeSometimes sex within the office can make you a more fulfilled person. A 10 minute session with your girlfriend who also happens to be your colleague can make you a better worker with a sexually gratified existence. "I like to make out in the office for 5-7 minutes. It refreshes me and helps me concentrate better at achieving deadlines," reveals Shashi Gupa who works with a MNC. "Office make outs are very common in an age when people spend most of their time in office. Most indulge in it as a way to deal with work pressure," states Mehta. Dressing roomYou get all hot and heavy while your girl is changing in the dressing room of a clothing store? Well, why not just sneak in to give a kick to the monotony of a regular shopping spree. "I tried it once with my girlfriend when the salesperson was called away for a while. Imagine the fun you can have inside the changing room as there are mirrors everywhere. Seeing yourselves in the mirror can make you knees go jell,y so just think about all that can follow," says student, Siddharth Roy. "Dressing rooms are great fun if you can actually figure an entry. But these days, with a lot of strict rules and surveillance cameras inserted everywhere, you may be asking for a lot of trouble if you indulge in these kind of getaways. Infact, unless you are a compleibitionist, it's best not to get involved in all this," advises Mehta.
Professionalism has taken its position in the life of young minds. These days, both men and women are competing in the market to have a better and luxurious life. Gone are the days when women used to be housewives and men used to earn a living. Women of this generation believe that they study so hard to work as a professional and not sit at home like a homemakers. Sitting at home with a masters degree is not their cup of tea. These days even men want to marry working women who can support them financially and is also be independent. But, having a working wife has both pros and cons. Lets check it out in brief. Pros and cons of a working wife: Understandable: Working wife can be good for you if you are always busy with your office work. Busy professionals need a wife who understands their situation and doesn't fight. Late night meetings and working from home even after returning from office are a few routine things done by a busy working man. If you have a working wife, you will be benefited as she will understand your situation and cooperate. Supportive: A working spouse can be of great use when you are feeling down. Peer and work pressure can at times frustrate you and this can put you under depression also! If you have a working wife, she will be always be there by your side to help and support you when required. Same goals: This is one of the pros of having a working wife. You both will mutually have a set of goals for your future. For example, you two want to have a bright and luxurious future and for that, you need to save. Thus, you decide to earn and save. This common goal keeps the working couple together and also strengthens the relationship. Cons Lack of time: If you have a busy working wife, you would be at a little loss. While you can take out some time for your beautiful wife, she might be too busy to come and give you a peck! This is one of the biggest cons of having a working wife. She will not be free to spend time with family wholeheartedly. Even your kids get less time when both their parents are working. Complexity: Many working couples have some complexity problems with each other. If you are at a higher position than your husband and work just the double, you might risk your happy married life. This is a major relationship problem that working couples face. Male ego plays a strong role in bringing such gaps in a happy married life. There are very few men who take the success of their wife very joyously. These are few pros and cons of having a working wife. Do you have more points to add in the list? Share with us.
Every time we hear about a teacher student romance, there is a sharp intake of breath; then 'ooooo' and 'ahhhhhh' follows. A romantic relationship between teachers and students is not without precedence. In fact, it is one of those love stories that is straight out of the textbook. However, we are still shocked by a teacher student romance because it is one of those taboo relationships in our society. While a student is still immature and can get infatuated to his/her teacher, is it ethical for a teacher to fall in love with his/her student? On the occasion of Teacher's Day here is Boldsky's take on it. Why the student falls in love? Most of us idolise our teachers as adolescents. A confused teenager is disciplined by teachers, ridiculed by friends and often finds solace in a teacher. The teacher thus becomes that one adult who tries to understand them. It is not easy to find a friend in an adult and that element of friendship draws the student towards the teacher. Some teacher student relationships are like hero-worship. The student literally worships the teacher and that turns into a platonic love. Why the teacher reciprocates this love? Every teacher was once a student. That is why it is easier for them to understand how it feels to be on the otherside of the desk. Moreover, a teacher sometimes develop a sense of protective instinct for the student that is almost kin to love. However, there are some cases of teacher student romance where the teacher is just going through a mid life crisis and falls for a younger guy or girl. When is it unethical? If a teacher uses the devotion of student for his or her own ulterior motives, then it is not ethical. The relationship between a teacher and student should be selfless. A teacher must never manipulate the student for jumping into a romantic relationship. Having said that, teaching is a profession and falling in love with a student is unprofessional. A student must also realise that a teacher can never become an equal; they must always be held at a position of respect. If a student uses a teacher student romance as a means to secure good grades then it is sheer cunning. Why make a value judgement? We have often heard people say that a teacher-student relationship is sacred and must not be tainted with romantic love. So, does that mean that romantic love is unholy or disgraceful? Love is an emotion that is holy in every form. So even if a teacher student romance is taboo by social norms, it is sacred because it is 'love' nonetheless. So our message on the occasion of Teacher's day is that as long as love is pure and genuine, it needs no social justification.
Conflict is unavoidable but learning how to war right strengthens the relationship Arguments are unavoidable in relationships but how you fight makes all the difference. It may feel therapeutic for the moment to vent and give in to a verbal whipping, but it will only cause resentment and perhaps invite payback. Clinical Psychologist Seema Hingorrany places arguments in two categories - destructive and constructive. "Destructive arguments include elements of hostility and vengeance. You can have a constructive argument by sticking to the issue and dealing with it calmly. It prevents the argument from culminating into a major breach." The way we fight reflects how our parents dealt with issues. If you have a dysfunctional memory of your parents' fights, you will get defensive. If you're harbouring grudges against your parents, it can spill into your relationship, and intervention is crucial. Common mistakesPeople can resort to open and/or secret warfare. Open warfare is where you are aggressive and negative in approach, while secret warfare (e.g. silent treatment, stonewalling) is passive aggressive. Seema lists the errors one is prone to make in a heated moment: - Turning nasty, hitting below the belt or pointing out flaws. - Character assassination, raising your voice and hurting your partner's ego. - Digging up past incidents. - Bringing up partner's parents and say uncomplimentary things about them. - Volleying blame. - Constant stonewalling or giving the silent treatment. - Threatening to leave, which causes tremendous insecurity. Resolution techniques The goal of arguments should be to become more aware of the problem, instead of attacking the partner. Seema suggests these techniques to find the emotional balance: - Take a container each, label it and put notes about troubling issues in each other's container. It gives your partner time to process his/ her thoughts. - Do one activity together, e.g. bake or work out together. - Undertake calming exercises together — the Art of Living courses, meditating before sleeping, talking about the best places you have visited. Talking about something pleasant after the fight always works. Activating positive memories is the key. - Self-discipline is crucial. Accept that you cannot have a conflictfree relationship. Don't compare yourself to other loving couples. Don't say 'But my personality is like that'; make an effort to change that trait. You can't expect your partner to automatically understand what you are going through. Banging doors, public fights, etc. reach that level of catastrophe because you haven't addressed the issues. Modulate your voice and watch your body language. - Don't take your problems to bed. If it gets destructive (e.g. verbally abusive), declare a time-out. » Be relaxed and calm. The more you badger, the less your partner will be willing to talk. Avoiding confrontation is a part of some people's personality. Understand their personality and respect that. Sometimes writing a note, e-mail or a gold old-fashioned letter is the best way to communicate with a passive aggressive partner. - Never stonewall your partner. If you don't want to talk, step away but provide an explanation. - Avoid long gaps in a fight, otherwise your partner will hold grudges and resent you. - Never argue when you or your partner are tired or hungry. - Don't start the blame game; it will only make the other person defensive. Both of you can make a list of pointers that bother you and then deal with them diplomatically. - Women are wired to communicate; they need coping resources as the stress can lead to lack of sleep and loss of appetite. Journaling helps to contain the negativity. Cultivate new friendships and hobbies to put problems in perspective. - Emotional distance is crucial. If you're hyper, take a walk and come back. - Choose battles wisely. - Beware of magnifying or distort problems. Stick to the issue and keep the conflict specific. - Some people suffer from mood swings. Catch them in a good mood if you want to make a point. You can't change the core of a person, but learn how to work around it. - Respect the boundaries of the relationship. Do not discuss the issues with outsiders except for a commonly agreed upon mediator.
Gen-i has a new test for intimacy-sharing passwords. Damned if you do, and damned if you don't! A recent survey claims that 30% of teenagers who use the internet have shared at least one personal online password with a friend or a significant other. The study also says that girls are twice as likely as boys to give away their secret codes. Strange as it may sound, it is beginning to be considered as a sign of trust and intimacy among youngsters. BFFs share everythingThat girlie bonding between two BFFs ( Best Friends Forever) has now extended to sharing passwords. "My best friend and I share everything, and never keep a secret from each other, then why not our passwords? She checks my social networking page and informs me immediately if my crush comments on my picture, and I can check her mails and see which forward mail in her inbox I'd like for myself, etc. It's just fun," says Shweta Pahujani, 19, a fashion designing student. Some have a serious reason too. "Ever since that b**ch in my class blocked me from her Facebook list, I took my best friend's password to check her account for that girl's updates. She got clicked with my boyfriend... &%*#$..." details a livid Aakriti Menon, 16, a class XI student. Another curious case is of photographer Ayesha Sharma, 22, who feels that sharing passwords with her friend is important. Otherwise, who will keep her account active when she, ahem, dies? "I mean, people can refer to my account even after I am gone," she explains, "I share it with my best friend and I know she can be trusted. That way, maybe, I'd never die, at least not for my loved ones." Do you love me? Then give me your password.According to the study, passwords are being compared to sex in terms of intimacy and vulnerability. So, people need to share them to show that they trust their partner. More often than not, girls urge their boyfriends to share their passwords so that they can check if they're cheating on them, etc. The insecure ones even check their BFs' chat records to know 'woh us ladki se kya baat kar raha tha?' "We know each other's passwords and I love to scan every single chat of his. Somehow, it gives me peace of mind to know that he is loyal to me. Surprisingly, he does not even talk about me with his friends, something I thought he did," discloses Manjari Malhotra, 23, a content writer. But as researchers warn, password-sharing can have dangerous implications. "My girlfriend demanded my password, scanned my chats, and later broke up with me, 'coz she was upset that I complimented my female classmate. I'm not doing this ever again in a relationship," rues Shivam Singh, 20, a law student. Can't share your password? I'm breaking upHowever, some people might suffer a breakup only because they did not share their passwords. Ruchi Anand, 22, recalls, "My boyfriend wanted my Facebook password, and I didn't want to give it. I wasn't comfortable with letting him read my and my best friend's girlie conversations. Eventually, we broke up." What do they do with passwords?- "When I found out that my best friend was dating the guy I had a crush on, I forwarded the two's online conversation to my friend's mom. She got the lesson of her life." -"I learnt that my boyfriend was dating multiple girls. So I used his password and sent a hate mail to all those girls. They dumped him, I dumped him too. My revenge was over." -I sent a love letter to our class teacher from my ex's account. He still doesn't know who did it."
A relationship counsellor in Australia has suggested easier ways to break up with you lover, while showing respect to him or her at the same time. "Being told 'it's over' is never going to be great news no matter how it is delivered," the Sydney Morning Herald quoted Relationships Australia counsellor, Bill Hewlett. "But you can make it more comfortable to some degree." She suggests that relationship should be called off in person. Do not deliver the bad news by email or even worse, have someone else do it for you. "Ending it in person shows that you have respect for the person and the relationship," said Hewlett. Apparently, April 2 is the date that the more relationships fail than any other according to data released by Facebook which tabulated the number of status changes from 'in a relationship' to 'single' and 'married' to 'divorced' over 2010 and 2011. In any case, if you want to be one of the crowd, today is the day to break it off. Always resort to telling the truth. The tired cliche, 'it's not you, it's me' just doesn't cut it. Tell your partner, with decorum, why the relationship is not working for you. "Everyone needs closure," said clinical psychologist Jo Lamble. "We find it very hard to move on from a relationship if the reasons for the break-up don't make sense. It's far better to be as honest as possible, for the sake of the person you're rejecting." Delivering the news in the form of a feedback sandwich can alleviate the pain inflicted. It works by saying something nice, delivering the bad news and then finishing with a positive statement. "The person getting dumped is going to feel rejected," said Hewlett. "So it's important to give them some good feedback amongst the bad news." Hewlett recommends highlighting a quality you admire in them and to finish by reiterating that your time together will not be forgotten. If you are uncertain about the next step, enlist the help of a counsellor for relationship advice. "Ending a relationship requires serious consideration and that may involve the use of sounding boards including friends, family, or a counsellor," said Jo Lamble. "But be aware that everyone-except hopefully the counsellor - may have their own agenda for any advice they give, so that's why I suggest using others as a sounding board so you can hear your own voice, not theirs." Hewlett also suggests steering clear of your computer as not only will you have to contend with social media's abrupt defriending and unfollowing, you may be receiving an email from WotWentWrong.com, a site allowing dumpees to ask their dumpers for answers via a third party. Timing should be well chosen. Don't deliver the news on a special occasion or birthday, you don't want your ex associating that date with heartbreak and rejection forevermore. And don't do it just before they are heading off to work or an event. It makes sense that Friday is the day of the week that most break-ups happen according to the aforementioned Facebook study, as it gives you and your now-ex the weekend to help recover. To be clear why you are leaving, it might be a good idea to write yourself a detailed list with your reasons. This can be referred to later when you are feeling heartbroken after fixating on the good times. Don't say 'we need to talk'. If you want to set off alarm bells that will cause a wall to instantly come up or for the person to run a mile before you've had the chance to say what you need to say, do not speak, text or email these four dreaded words. Instead, get straight to the point, using the aforementioned feedback sandwich. So that the news is not a massive shock, Jo Lamble advises to give some warnings that you are unhappy in the time leading up to the break-up. Counsellor also suggests taking a test first. Researchers have developed a test which can predict whether a relationship is going to last. Using automatic word association, Ronald D. Rogge and associates from the University of Rochester studied 222 coupled volunteers automatic responses. The researchers found that volunteers who found it easy to associate their partner with bad things and difficult to associate the partner with good things were more likely to separate over the next year. While it is fine to give warnings, Jo Lamble advises against constant threats of leaving. If you say it, be prepared to back it up with the action. Change can be scary, so it's wise to get your hands on as much information as you can in preparation for the life-changing event. Setting boundaries is also quite vital. If asked 'can we still be friends?' know that it might be best to keep your distance for a while. Don't start looking for someone else first as that is just bad taste as you may end up facing the awkward situation of answering your own partner's want ad.
Supermodel Heidi Klum, actress Eva Longoria, singer-actress Nicole Kidman and many others have gone on record saying that they like to bring out their kinky side in the bedroom. Couples who have experienced their 'fetish' for such fantasies swear by its pleasure. Whether you want to be the wild cat and use the belt to control your partner or use sex toys to spunk up your game of love, kinky sex is a great way to add spice to your sex life. Klum had once said, "There's nothing wrong with using a nice garter belt." While she loves to rule, Longoria prefers to be submissive. She admits that she loves being tied up with silk scarves during lovemaking. She likes a man to take charge. Each one of us has a deep desire to be ruled or to rule. Kinky sex gives you the opportunity to turn those dreams into reality. Tie me downImagine lying down on your bed waiting for your partner. Suddenly your hands are handcuffed and you get blindfolded. You have no idea what's happening when your partner whispers in your ear, 'Honey, submit yourself.' He caresses you and takes you on a journey where all your desires seem to be fulfilled. Imagine! You are bound to reach the ultimate point of satisfaction. Role playWhen you are bored with your routine sex life and love making becomes 'just another task, try making it fun (instead of faking that headache). Role-playing is a must-try for those who wish to fulfill their sexual fantasies. Think of some interesting scenarios and don some exciting costumes and let your imagination guide you. Dress up like a maid, or a teenager, or try more mature roles like MILF or a teacher seducing a student. Guys could enact the role of a cow boy, or a cabana boy. Deliciously unexpectedKinky sex is all about 'revealing' your wild side. If you are mild and sober in your real life, be the king of the fantasy world. Dominate the bedroom moves. Spank your partner or do smut talking - the shock your partner will get to see this side of you will get things in the right gear. Lovely toysWhile many use them to satisfy themselves when their partner is away, you can try them when your partner is with you. The reason? Multiple orgasms. Dildos, vibrators, Wen ba balls are some toys you could try to kick-start a heated sexual frenzy. Dance, baby, danceA seductive dance is all it takes to woo your partner. Guys could try the American Pie dance (at your own risk) and girls could do the sexy pole dance. Play her favourite song in the background and do a close dance. Slowly touch her and feel her and you are all set for a hot and sexy night. Spank her tightSpank her, bite him, hit him, pull her hair, do what you like to make it a passionate sexual encounter. These are just a few ways to make your sex life pleasurable. Bring out the sexy, naughty, bitchy you for a more fanatical Love.
Women's magazines, chat shows and conventional wisdom have us believe that men are born cheaters. Some seven-and-a-half years into a relationship, apparently their radar shifts and they start to hunt for sexier conquests. All this while, women too have 'given into the moment', been overcome by emotional weakness and honestly put, cheated on boyfriends and husbands. So women are human too and most certainly indulge the animal within themselves. The X-Factor presents a list of reasons why women would risk a healthy relationship for the 'dark side'. Not enough sex You can't remember the last time you had a night-long sex-a-thon? Life comes in the way of intimacy in ways one doesn’t realise and before you know it, it’s kids over kink, work over wooing and stress over sex. Women want to feel wanted. If you’re not making an effort to make her feel special, she could seek it elsewhere. Rekindle the romance by planning date nights and special sex nights. More importantly, don’t give up on the kissing and cuddling. You cheated, now my turn Whoever said hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, had it bang on (pun unintended). You cheat and the one way she knows she can get back at you is by giving you a dose of your own medicine. For her, cheating in retaliation levels the playing field. While you can’t undo your deeds, you can certainly ask her for forgiveness and assure her it won’t happen again. And mean it. Experimentation Men are not the only ones with an inner wild side. Often women have a very dormant frisky inner self that doesn’t come to the fore until perhaps a major change in their lives. Major weight loss, a new job, a new boss, new friends, moving to a new city or even mid-life crisis can constitute this phase. Anything that is a big change from the mundane can be inspiring enough. Ensure you are communicating well. Better that than having her pour her heart out to someone else, no? Feeling sidelined Women are housekeepers, babysitters and even cleaners while they’re at home. Working women with children have to deal with work stress, a child to go home to and a million tiny chores to finish. Often they feel like they’re getting the raw end of the deal. Don’t sit on your derriere and wait for instructions. Go out and help her with some chores without being asked to. While you’re at it, thank her for doing the kind of things you have no initiative for. Bedroom boredom Over-familiarity breeds adultery. A sex routine can be incredibly boring after years of following the same-position-same-setting format. An affair offers the chance to spice things up and brings in a sense of adventure. Start doing the unexpected-playful PDA, plan a surprise weekend getaway or even some footsie at the dinner table. Feel good factor Sex can lift up one’s mood and make one feel good almost instantly. Good sex, that is. Of course if your wife or girlfriend is prone to low self-esteem there’s little you can do about it, but you can help prevent the situation from deteriorating. While it certainly is taxing if you constantly have to make her feel good and go out of the way to keep her ego intact, it won’t harm you to pay more attention and make her feel secure in her relationship with you. Reaction to your lack of emotions Women think from their hearts. Their most important decisions aren’t executed without a go ahead from their hearts. If your girlfriend/partner notices that over a period of time you have emotionally withdrawn, she looks at it as a sign that things are coming to an end. So in her heart, she is just moving on. Be emotionally present to avoid this situation. A way out This one is convenient. Instead of breaking up with you, she cheats on you. That way she doesn’t have to deal with the broken relationship alone, which is much harder to fix. An affair lets her keep her ego in place and makes her get over you faster. Keeping a Plan B may not always be a good thing. Good communication can thwart this strategy.
Women's magazines, chat shows and conventional wisdom have us believe that men are born cheaters. Some seven-and-a-half years into a relationship, apparently their radar shifts and they start to hunt for sexier conquests. All this while, women too have 'given into the moment', been overcome by emotional weakness and honestly put, cheated on boyfriends and husbands. So women are human too and most certainly indulge the animal within themselves. The X-Factor presents a list of reasons why women would risk a healthy relationship for the 'dark side'. Not enough sex You can’t remember the last time you had a night-long sex-a-thon? Life comes in the way of intimacy in ways one doesn’t realise and before you know it, it’s kids over kink, work over wooing and stress over sex. Women want to feel wanted. If you’re not making an effort to make her feel special, she could seek it elsewhere. Rekindle the romance by planning date nights and special sex nights. More importantly, don’t give up on the kissing and cuddling. You cheated, now my turn Whoever said hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, had it bang on (pun unintended). You cheat and the one way she knows she can get back at you is by giving you a dose of your own medicine. For her, cheating in retaliation levels the playing field. While you can’t undo your deeds, you can certainly ask her for forgiveness and assure her it won’t happen again. And mean it. Experimentation Men are not the only ones with an inner wild side. Often women have a very dormant frisky inner self that doesn’t come to the fore until perhaps a major change in their lives. Major weight loss, a new job, a new boss, new friends, moving to a new city or even mid-life crisis can constitute this phase. Anything that is a big change from the mundane can be inspiring enough. Ensure you are communicating well. Better that than having her pour her heart out to someone else, no? Feeling sidelined Women are housekeepers, babysitters and even cleaners while they’re at home. Working women with children have to deal with work stress, a child to go home to and a million tiny chores to finish. Often they feel like they’re getting the raw end of the deal. Don’t sit on your derriere and wait for instructions. Go out and help her with some chores without being asked to. While you’re at it, thank her for doing the kind of things you have no initiative for. Bedroom boredom Over-familiarity breeds adultery. A sex routine can be incredibly boring after years of following the same-position-same-setting format. An affair offers the chance to spice things up and brings in a sense of adventure. Start doing the unexpected — playful PDA, plan a surprise weekend getaway or even some footsie at the dinner table. Feel good factor Sex can lift up one’s mood and make one feel good almost instantly. Good sex, that is. Of course if your wife or girlfriend is prone to low self-esteem there’s little you can do about it, but you can help prevent the situation from deteriorating. While it certainly is taxing if you constantly have to make her feel good and go out of the way to keep her ego intact, it won’t harm you to pay more attention and make her feel secure in her relationship with you. Reaction to your lack of emotions Women think from their hearts. Their most important decisions aren’t executed without a go ahead from their hearts. If your girlfriend/partner notices that over a period of time you have emotionally withdrawn, she looks at it as a sign that things are coming to an end. So in her heart, she is just moving on. Be emotionally present to avoid this situation. A way out This one is convenient. Instead of breaking up with you, she cheats on you. That way she doesn’t have to deal with the broken relationship alone, which is much harder to fix. An affair lets her keep her ego in place and makes her get over you faster. Keeping a Plan B may not always be a good thing. Good communication can thwart this strategy.
Almost 100 per cent of women who cheat on their partners never get found out, but men are not as good at covering their tracks with 17 per cent admitting to getting caught, a new survey has found. The research carried out by a dating website for married people found that 95 per cent of women and 83 per cent of men claim to have successfully conducted illicit encounters without their spouses finding out. UndercoverLovers asked 3,000 women and the same number of men if their partners knew about their cheating and found that the overall percentage of straying spouses that never get found out is 89 per cent. According to Dr David Holmes, a psychologist at Manchester Metropolitan University, women are having more affairs than ever but they behave very differently from men when they cheat. Recent studies suggest the figure is around 20 per cent for men and a little over 15 per cent for women. "Women are better liars because they''re more psychologically sophisticated," the Daily Mail quoted Holmes as saying. "Emotionally they make plans and have strategies, while men are more impulsive. "The biggest difference is that women are much better at keeping their affairs secret. "If you look at the studies into paternity, even conservative figures show that between eight and 15 per cent of children haven't been fathered by the man who thinks he's the biological parent," he said. Emily Pope of Undercover Lovers, which has more than 650,000 members, also said that women are better liars as compared the opposite sex. "Many of our members, both male and female, have been philandering for years without being caught," she said. "Studies have shown that women are actually better liars than men, so it's not surprising that female adulterers are better at getting away with it than their male counterparts," Pope added.
You can remember things from long ago as if they happened just yesterday but at times can't recall what you ate for dinner last night because how much something means to you actually influences how you see it as well as how vividly you can recall it later, researchers say. While this may seem common-sense to romantics across the world, confirmation can now be seen in EEG images which captured the emotions of participants in a new study led by psychologists at the University of Toronto. "We've discovered that we see things that are emotionally arousing with greater clarity than those that are more mundane," the Daily Mail quoted Lead author Rebecca Todd as saying. "Whether they're positive - for example, a first kiss, the birth of a child, winning an award - or negative, such as traumatic events, breakups, or a painful and humiliating childhood moment that we all carry with us, the effect is the same. "What's more, we found that how vividly we perceive something in the first place predicts how vividly we will remember it later on. "We call this 'emotionally enhanced vividness' and it is like the flash of a flashbub that illuminates an event as it's captured for memory," she said. By studying brain activity, Todd's team along with researchers at the University of Manchester and the University of California, San Diego found that the part of the brain responsible for tagging the emotional or motivational importance of things according to one's own past experience - the amygdala - is more active when looking at images that are rated as vivid. This increased activation in turn influences activity in both the visual cortex, enhancing activity linked to seeing objects, and in the posterior insula, a region that integrates sensations from the body. "The experience of more vivid perception of emotionally important images seems to come from a combination of enhanced seeing and gut feeling driven by amygdala calculations of how emotionally arousing an event is," she said. The researchers began by measuring the subjective experience of the vividness of perception. Taking pictures of scenes that were emotionally arousing and negative, emotionally arousing and positive - mostly mild erotica, and neutral scenes, they overlaid the images with varying amounts of 'visual noise', which looked like the snow one would see on an old television screen. The pictures were then shown to study participants who were asked to say whether each image had the same, more, or less noise than a standard image with a fixed amount of noise. "We found that while people were good at rating how much noise was on the picture relative to a standard, they consistently rated pictures that were emotionally arousing as less noisy than neutral pictures regardless of the actual level of noise," she said. In the first study, 45 minutes after they did the noise task, participants were asked to write down all the details they could about pictures they remembered seeing. How much detail they remembered was a measure of vividness. In the second study, participants were shown the pictures again one week later and asked if they remembered them and, if so, how vividly they remembered them from very vague to very detailed. "Both studies found that pictures that were rated higher in emotionally enhanced vividness were remembered more vividly," Todd said. Finally, the researchers used brain imaging measures to look at when the brain responded to emotionally enhanced vividness and what regions of the brain responded. Using electrophysiology (EEG) to measure the timing of activity in the cortex to see when the brain is sensitive to vividness, gave them a sense of whether this subjective vividness was more about seeing vividly, or thinking that it was more vivid when you''re considering it after the fact. "We found that the brain indexes vividness pretty quickly - about a 5th of a second after seeing a picture, which suggests it''s about seeing and not just thinking," Todd said. "Emotion alters activity in the visual cortex, which in turn influences how we see. "When a picture was rated as less noisy, then they actually saw the picture underneath more clearly, as if there is more signal relative to noise in the emotionally arousing picture. "The subjective meaning of a picture actually influenced how clearly the participants saw it," she said. The researchers used additional tests to rule out other explanations of their findings, such as how ''noisy'' a picture seems due to less vibrant colours or a more complex scene. They also used eye-tracking measures to eliminate the possibility that people look at emotionally arousing images differently, causing them to rate some as more vivid. The investigators also used functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to look at what brain regions were more active when people look at things that they perceive as more vivid because they''re emotionally important. Again, they found amygdala, visual cortex, and interoceptive cortex activity went up with increased vividness.